If we truly want a better life, we must prioritise needs and outcomes over wants and the desire to control how things look along the way.
Most of us no longer believe that what we’re living through is “normal.” Yet many still cling to two opposing desires: either to return to a time when life felt better, or to reshape everything so that the world functions perfectly for us alone.
Strangely, there’s little space between these extremes. Nostalgia for a past we cannot reclaim, and fantasies of a future moulded entirely to individual preferences, are both unrealistic and harmful. No system can work for everyone if it’s built solely on the desires of a few.
What we often fail to grasp is that life demands a choice: we can either commit to a meaningful outcome—accepting the discomfort and change required to reach it—or we can try to dictate every step of the journey and hope we arrive comfortably. But these two paths are mutually exclusive. Just as wants and needs differ, so do outcomes and the conditions we try to impose.
Every outcome is a choice. Every condition we set is also a choice. And every choice carries consequences—some powerful enough to reshape lives.
Today, the world feels increasingly chaotic. The systems we’ve long relied on—money, politics, business, hierarchies, globalisation—are nearing collapse. Yet again, we find ourselves split: some want to restore the old ways, while others want to control the terms of change.
A fitting analogy is this: we’re all passengers on a bus speeding toward a cliff we quietly acknowledge but refuse to confront. Instead of working together to stop the bus or take control, we focus on our own comfort—tightening seatbelts, adjusting seats—ignoring the looming drop that threatens everything we hold dear.
It’s uncomfortable to accept, but whether driven by nostalgia, selfishness, or idealism, the system—the bus—is heading off that cliff. Unless we take a leap of faith and jump, the outcome is sealed. The chance to forge a new path, one that could lead to a better future, will vanish.
Adam Tugwell 
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